# o trasnaie de enervat poporul pe canal cand aude bot-ul de 'bere' :)
# AltBlue 2000
#
# version stuff..
set beer_version v1.1

#####
## BINDINGS
bind pub - !beer beer:pub:smart
bind pub - !bere beer:pub:smart
bind pubm - "*" beer:pub:lame

bind msg - beer beer:priv:smart
bind msg - bere beer:priv:smart

bind ctcp - ACTION beer:ctcp



proc beer:ctcp {nick uhost hand chan key arg} {
	global botnick
	if {[string tolower $nick] != [string tolower $botnick]} {
		if {[string match "* bere*" [string tolower $arg]] || [string match "* beer*" [string tolower $arg]]} {
				global beer_lame
				putserv "PRIVMSG $chan :\001ACTION says to $nick: [lindex $beer_lame [rand [llength $beer_lame]]] \001"
		}
	}
	return 0
}


proc beer:pub:lame {nick uhost hand chan arg} {
	global botnick
	if {[string tolower $nick] == [string tolower $botnick]} {return 0}

	if { [string match "* bere*" $arg] || [string match "* beer*" $arg] || [string match "* beri*" $arg]} {
		putlog "BEER nausea from $nick"
		if {[string match "*ab*" [string tolower $arg]]} {
			global beer_quotes
			putserv "PRIVMSG $chan :\001ACTION says to $nick: [lindex $beer_quotes [rand [llength $beer_quotes]]] \001"; return 0
		} else {
			global beer_lame
			putserv "PRIVMSG $chan :\001ACTION says to $nick: [lindex $beer_lame [rand [llength $beer_lame]]] \001"
		}
	}
	return 0
}

proc beer:priv:smart {nick uhost hand arg} {
	global beer_quotes
	putserv "NOTICE $nick : [lindex $beer_quotes [rand [llength $beer_quotes]]]"
	return 0
}

proc beer:pub:smart {nick uhost hand chan text} {
	global beer_quotes
	putserv "PRIVMSG $chan :\001ACTION says to $nick: [lindex $beer_quotes [rand [llength $beer_quotes]]] \001"; return 0
}

set beer_quotes {
{You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline; it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. (Frank Zappa)}
{Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. (Ernest Hemmingway)}
{Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. (Winston Churchill)}
{Save water! Drink beer!}
{He was a wise man who invented beer. (Plato)}
{Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time. (Catherine Zandonella)}
{A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. (W.C. Fields)}
{Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink. (Lady Astor to Winston Churchill)}
{Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it. (His reply)}
{If God had intended us not to drink beer, He would not have given us stomachs. (David Daye)}
{Work is the curse of the drinking class. (Oscar Wilde)}
{When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. (Henny Youngman)}
{Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. (Benjamin Franklin)}
{If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose. (Deep Thought, Jack Handy)}
{Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. (Dave Barry)}
{The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. (Humphrey Bogart)}
{People who drink light beer don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee alot. (Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI)}
{Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. (Kaiser Welhelm)}
{I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer. (Homer Simpson)}
{Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. (Dave Barry)}
{I drink to make other people interesting. (George Jean Nathan)}
{An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. (For Whom the Bell Tolls, Ernest Hemmingway)}
{You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. (Dean Martin)}
{All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer. (Homer Simpson)}
}

set beer_lame {
  {BERE?! Unde ?}
  {Nu ar fi mai buna o sticloantza de vin ? }
  {Bei fara mine ?}
  {Faci cinste cu o berica si mie ?}
  {Can I join you for a drink ?}
  {Hey now, talkin'bout beer, you could at least get me one too!}
  {What, someone here said something about BEER ?!! Gimme, gimme, gimme !!!}
  {Am auzit io bine, da careva o bere ?!}
  {Hmm.... berea ingrasa... si totusi, cine da o bere ?!}
  {Heyo, I'm thursty, gimme me a bottle !}
  {hic! cred ca hic! am baut hic! deja prea hic! multa bere hic!}
  {eh.. as bea si io o bere-doua...}
  {inca una si ma duc :)}
}

putlog "Beer nausea $beer_version loaded."