% A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition. % Woman wishes to wish away the differences between the sexes. but then, that is the nature of woman. % Some men are different. All women are alike. % For story and experience tell us, That man grows old and women jealous; Both would their little ends secure: He sighs for freedom, she for power. His wishes tend abroad to roam. And hers, to domineer at home. % She is like a stone on the hilltop, difficult to be moved. Yet when she is once started she goeth fast and far; no man knoweth her end. She believeth that ALL men are vain and easy to be flattered. Her heart is older than her head; yea, her emotion is the mother of her reason. She desireth many things, and she is happy till she getteth them. TWO things she holdeth dear, mystery and mastery. % A man gets what he wants by acting smart; a woman, by playing dumb. % Why is it we never hear of a self-made woman? % Woman submits to her fate; man makes his. % God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him. % There are two kinds of women: those who wish to marry, and those who haven't the slightest intention not to. % To a single woman men are either dates, potential dates, or date substitutes. % There's only one way to get on for a woman, and that's to please men. That is what women think men are for. % Women: an infinity of cosmetics. % Men say knowledge is power; women think dress is power. % Women who are not vain about their clothes are often vain about not being vain about their clothes. % Women are the decorative sex. They never have anything to say, but they say it charmingly. % Woman's first duty is to her dressmaker. What the second duty is no one has yet discovered. % There are few women whose worth lasts longer than their beauty. % Woman strives for loveliness, man for dignity. % Beauty is the wisdom of women. Wisdom is the beauty of men. % Many women would swap brains for beauty and think they were getting the best of the bargain. % The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows that the average man can see much better than he can think. % "After men, monkeys have the most intelligence," says an author. Others will argue that women do. % Smart men are smarter than they look; smart women look smarter than they are. % The heart is the whole of women, who are guided by nothing else: and it has so much to say, even with men . . . that it triumphs in every struggle with the understanding. % A young lady who thinks is like a young man who rouges. % To find fault with a woman's intellect you must first find her intellect. % Women have simple tastes. They can get pleasure out of the conversation of children in arms and men in love. % A man, conceivably, could adjust to the knowledge that he was at a higher level than those around him, although no rational man could possibly enjoy that perspective; but to a woman it would be unbearable. % Essentially feminine, she was able to chatter but say nothing, ask questions and require no reply. % Women can write more interestingly than men on the really important topics of civilization: dress, food and furniture. % She wavers, she hesitates; in a word, she is a woman. % Woman's one notable invention: Perpetual emotion. % Women are always eagerly on the lookout for any emotion. % Women: picturesque protests against the mere existence of common sense. % A woman's hopes are woven of sunbeams; a shadow annihilates them. % No wonder women live longer than men - look how long they remain girls. % You bring up your girls to be ornaments and then complain of their frivolity. % When he has a thorn in his side, she has to have a sword through her heart. % Of what use is independence to a woman, if she is - all alone? % If the parasite woman on the couch, the plaything and amusement of men, be the permanent and final manifestation of female human life on the planet, then that couch is also the death % bed of human evolution. % Democracy is woman's greatest invention. Indeed, it even reflects her character: purposeless, irrational, subject to public opinion and passing fashions, rambling, confused, underhanded, scheming, in love with its own purity. % To be a woman is something so strange, so confusing and so complicated that only a woman could put up with it and, what is worse, feel happy about it. % Woman: a biped with two hands, two feet, two breasts, two eyes and two faces. % A woman has three reasons for everything she does: the reason she says she has, the reason she thinks she has, and the reason she really has. % I will not say that women have no character, rather, they have a new one every day. % I've never met a man of good character who has had anything to do with a woman. % A man of straw is worth a woman of gold. % A woman never forgets her sex. She would rather talk with a man than an angel, any day. % Between a woman's "yes" and "no" there is no room for the point of a needle. % Even a fickle woman is loyal to one man - until she prefers another. % Her husband's funeral Is often where a widow looks for the next man. % Woman's virtue is man's greatest invention. % Indiscretion: the guilt of woman. % A woman sometimes feels pity for the sorrows that she causes without remorse. % No matter how much a woman loved a man, it would still give her a glow to see him commit suicide for her. % A woman rarely discards one lover until she is sure of another. % What is conscience to a wife? . . . To marry is to domesticate the Recording Angel. % The formation of a young lady's mind and character usually consists in telling her lies. % With a man, a lie is a last resort; with women, it's First Aid. % Women are not half as sensitive about their sins as about their follies. % Women always speak the truth, but not the whole truth. % Most women think that truth is an irrelevant triviality whose only role in life is as a stumbling block for men. % A man with a bad heart has been sometimes saved by a strong head; but a corrupt woman is lost forever. % The one thing that man never gives to a woman is spiritual help. % The souls of women are so small, that some believe they've none at all. % Is it not better to fall into the hands of a murderer than into the dreams of a lustful woman? % Women have no moral sense; they rely for their behaviour upon the men they love. % It has often been claimed that God is a woman, but to my knowledge no-one has ever claimed that the Devil is a woman and really meant it. So I will. % Men are women's playthings; woman is the Devil's. % Women give themselves to God when the Devil wants nothing more to do with them. % Women are not necessarily evil - but evil is necessarily feminine. % Where the Devil cannot go himself he sends an old woman. % Woman - last at the cross, earliest at the grave. % Woman: the hand that rules the cradle rocks the world. % Women learn how to hate in the degree that they forget how to charm. % Friendship among women is but a suspension of hostilities. % Misogynist: a man who hates women as much as women hate one another. % No man is as anti-feminist as the really feminine woman. % Woman is a domesticated animal; the feminist has returned to the wild. The goddess has gone wandering, collecting a few bruises, developing a few survival traits. She is lost; the bed beckons her. She will soon return. % When men and women agree, it is only in their conclusions; their reasons are always different. % Man's conclusions are reached by toil. Woman arrives at the same by sympathy. % A woman can believe anything in the world if there's no good reason for it. % Can you recall a woman who ever showed you with pride her library? % Women never reason, and therefore are (comparatively) seldom wrong. % Womens' intuition is the result of millions of years of not thinking. % Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious. % No woman, plain or pretty, has any common sense at all. Common sense is the privilege of our sex and we men are so self-sacrificing that we never use it. % Women would rather be right than reasonable. % It took a million years to develop man's ability to reason, but it takes only a few minutes of feminine logic to destroy it. % Women represent the triumph of matter over mind - just as men represent the triumph of mind over morals. % Taste: the feminine of genius. % Society is the book of women. % It is only rarely than one can see in a little boy the promise of a man, but one can almost always see in a little girl the threat of a woman. % If God considered woman a fit helpmate for man, he must have had a very poor opinion of man. % God created man, and finding him not sufficiently alone, gave him a companion to make him feel his solitude more fully. % Self-pity is one of the last things that any woman surrenders. % If all men told the truth the tears of women would create another flood. % It is sometimes argued that women have a hard enough time in this world, without telling them the truth. % A man who won't lie to a woman has very little consideration for her feelings. % Consistency: the only jewel found among more men than women. % Women's words are as light as doomed autumn leaves. % The easiest way to change a woman's mind is by agreeing, disagreeing, or saying nothing. % You sometimes have to answer a woman according to her womanishness, just as you have to answer a fool according to his folly. % The reason women usually win arguments with men is that only dumb men are foolish enough to argue with women. % Women take up ideas, like clothes, to suit their mood and whim, whereas men only permit themselves one quasi-original idea, (or "ism"), like a neck-tie. % I see the woman with a scarf twisted round her hair and a cigarette in her mouth. She has put the tea tray down upon the file on which my future depends. % Cunning: life is a battle of wits, and women have to fight it unarmed. % The wiles of most women are stronger than the wills of most men. % Some women are so clever that you can't talk to them for ten minutes without beginning to realize how brilliant you are. % There is something about cats and women that is viewed with distrust by mice and men. % On one issue at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women. % When they are going to be flagrantly brutally selfish, women love to talk of being fair. % The history of woman is the history of the worst form of tyranny the world has ever known. The tyranny of the weak over the strong. It is the only tyranny that lasts. % Women now insist on having all the prerogatives of the oak and all the perquisites of the clinging vine. % A woman weeps with one eye and laughs with the other. % Women want a mediocre man, and men are working hard to be as mediocre as possible. % Man says what he knows, woman what she pleases. % To be slow in words is a woman's only virtue. % When a man dies, the last thing that moves is his heart, in a woman her tongue. % Mouth: in man, the gateway to the soul, in woman, the outlet of the heart. % The greatest problem with women is how to contrive that they should seem our equals. % Women are neither equal nor different to men - they are inferior. Women rarely if ever organize themselves effectively because they are unable to think logically. % He knows little who will tell his wife all he knows. % He seldom errs Who thinks the worst he can of womankind. % Nature is in earnest when she makes a woman. % I expect that woman will be the last thing civilized by man. % It's a great advantage to women to be regarded as a race apart, an advantage which, as usual, they abuse unscrupulously. % There is only one real tragedy in a woman's life. The fact that her past is always her lover, and her future is invariably her husband. % A boy expands into a man; a girl contracts into a woman. % Women chat and men converse, Women gossip, men freely curse. Women question but men have doubt, Women are masonry, but men are the grout. % Men are worried about how many years they have left, women how many they have had. % Love of flattery, in most men, proceeds from the mean opinion they have of themselves; in women from the contrary. % A man likes you for what he thinks you are; a woman for what you think she is. % Time and circumstance, which enlarge the views of most men, narrow the views of women almost invariably. % Women's styles may change but their designs remain the same. % Women try their luck; men risk theirs. % We have emancipated women, but they remain slaves looking for their masters all the same. % A woman's chief asset is man's imagination. % The mystery of women is the product of the romantic imagination of men. % Women: sphinxes without secrets. % For a man to pretend to understand women is bad manners; for him really to understand them is bad morals. % Even when a man understands a woman, he can't believe it. % Men dislike women who don't understand them, and women dislike men who do. % As a woman's womb fills, her head empties. % There will continue to be a vast gulf between the sexes for as long as men and women are attracted to opposite things - namely each other. % The worst mistake a man can ever make is to presume that a woman thinks like a man. % The reason I think women are inferior is that I judge them by the same criteria as I judge men. % Women speak of equality (Problems) Men speak of difference (Superiority and inferiority) Difference is dynamic (Equality goes nowhere) % A woman will only trust a man who lies to her. % Man is evil because he is conscious of the thought that he is lying; but women are worse because they cannot be conscious of that thought. % Man hates with his mind and body, woman with her heart and soul. % Sadly, a woman's virtue and depth of character disappears during the third hour spent getting to know her. % When psychologists are asked to list the qualities of a healthy human mind they describe the qualities of the healthy male mind. Then, when asked to list the qualities of the healthy female mind, their list is not the same as that for the healthy human mind. % Women are good at trivial things because women think trivial things are important. Women are bad at important things because women do not realize how much harm they can do to the larger world outside of the small world of their immediate surrounds. % Woman: infinite to see, finite to hear. % Women: from goddesses to grannies. % It is not enough to educate women, they must not be loved. % The best thing a woman can do for a man is to marry somebody else. The best thing a man can do for a woman is to make a man of her, which usually necessitates just leaving her alone. % At the age of six, boys and girls are essentially the same. The difference is that boys tend to remain at the mental age of six throughout life, while girls seem to regress. % Women need to feel compassion for others because weakness in others justifies their own weakness. % Women always have some mental reservations. This is because most of their brains are out of bounds to them. % A woman wears her tears like jewelry. % Feminists would make great advances if they were not so bothered about sexist men; that is, if they were not so womanish. % To be popular with women, be sure never mention the fact that women as a class are less rational and hence inferior to men. % A man should aim to think as much as a woman feels. % Woman believes man's lies because she cares only about feelings, not future. She cannot realistically appreciate an honest man because honesty is superfluous to feelings. % Many women are convinced that the reason Jesus never got married was that he never met the right girl. % Women hate the man who speaks profoundly and obscurely; for it means that he does not need the company of women, never needs to explain himself, which means that he has not been tamed and therefore probably has a low opinion of women. Women far prefer the man who mistreats them to the one who gets away scot-free. It is for the same reason that we prefer people to do useless work badly than enjoy themselves constructively doing nothing. % Anyone who criticizes women is a misogynist. % Women are mysterious creatures; they sometimes appear superficially deep and at other times deeply superficial. % The horrifying thing about the mystery of woman is that there isn't one. % A woman thinks a man is unethical if he tries to measure her by ethical standards, for the reason that a woman cannot comprehend ethics. % A woman, like a child, has only the shallowest and most insubstantial of thoughts. If you were to try to paddle your feet in her oceans, you wouldn't even get your feet wet. % A man may become wise, If he really tries. But all women are born wise, In their own eyes. % It is good to condemn the feminine, but beware that in so doing you do not immortalize it in yourself. % From "Seven Against Thebes" by Aeschylus Good times, or bad times, may I never house With womankind! The courage of a woman Is insubmissive, rash, not counsellable, And, when she's timid, she's an added plague To home and fatherland! So is it now! Thanks to this hither, thither, to and fro Coursing of scared feet, the faint-hearted fear, Like to a chill tide, sounding as it goes, Runs through all orders of the Commonweal! And - while the foe without are mightily Advantaged - we ourselves within the gates Work for our own destruction! Whoso shares With womankind his fortunes, let him look For the like issue! Whatso'er he be, Man, woman - or some despicable thing Halfway betwixt them both - that from henceforth Fails in most strict obedience to my will, The damning pebble shall his lot decide, And he shall publicly be stoned to death! It longeth to a man - let womankind Keep their own counsel and not mell with ours - To manage matters in the world outside. % Women take offense and get angry, if anything, more easily than men, but their anger is inhibited by fear and other principles of their nature from expressing itself in blows.